By: karengray | April 15, 2019

When we look at it simply, your comfort zone is a behavioral space, or a mental space, where your activities and behaviors fit inside a nice steady routine and pattern that minimizes stress and risk. It provides a state of mental security. When you stay inside your comfort zone you benefit in obvious ways, enjoying regular happiness, low anxiety, and reduced stress.

The idea of the comfort zone goes back to 1908 when psychologists Robert M. Yerkes and John D. Dodson explained that a state of relative comfort created a steady level of performance. When we are able to maintain a steady and predictable state, then we can anticipate consistent results. And this sounds pretty good, until we want things to change.

In order to maximize performance w...

Category: Self Improvement 

Tags: stress, success, goals 

By: karengray | December 31, 2018

According to the Cambridge English Dictionary, a New Year’s Resolution is “a promise that you make to yourself to start doing something good or stop doing something bad on the first day of the year.” A 2018 YouGov poll ranked the most common goals in the U.S. were to eat healthier, get more exercise, and to save more money.

It’s been my experience that people, in general, want to be better than they are right now, and making a New Year’s Resolution is a great way to motivate yourself to follow through on your goals. It sounds easy enough for sure, but still many people can’t keep up the momentum of their resolution long enough to make real changes in their life. In 2017, U.S. News reported that approximately 80% of resolutions fail by the se...

Category: Self Care 

Tags: success, Resolutions, Goals 

By: karengray | December 10, 2018

I want to take a minute and step away from the Holiday theme to talk about something called the Scarcity Mindset. In short, this is the feeling that there is not enough ______ to go around. This perception is stressful and ultimately harmful to our success, and you can let it go.

There are enough jobs, enough clients, enough hours in the day, and enough money for everything you need. Once you fall into the trap of thinking that there isn't enough of these things, then you set yourself up for anxiety, stress, bitterness, and missed opportunities.

What is Scarcity Mindset?

We have all heard some version of the term “Predetermined Destiny”, meaning that what you focus on is what you get. As it turns out, there is a lot of truth in that, and it ha...

By: karengray | July 24, 2018

I know that it is the middle of Summer, and that no one really wants to think about school starting again, but the reality is that many schools will open in just a few short, sunny weeks.

I was reminded of this the other day when I asked my daughter how she was doing on her summer reading assignment. She is just going into middle school, and is an avid reader. Normally she cruises through books at an alarming pace, and it isn’t unusual for her to finish a book in less than a week. But right now it is summer, which means swimming and vacations, video games and playing outdoors. And right now, she is behind in her reading assignment.

For her, the solution was pretty simple, (she is used to having a hypnotist for a mom.) With a few careful phras...

By: karengray | July 09, 2018

“Such self-control!" Julie's friends exclaim when she declines a taste of the double chocolate truffle cheesecake. She enjoys the compliment until midnight -- when she sneaks downstairs and polishes off the last three slices.

"Just a few miles!" Becca tells herself as she puts on her sweats for a morning run. But instead she spends her exercise hour with a latte and muffin - and spends the rest of the day feeling guilty.

"This is my last cigarette!" announces Tom proudly, lighting up in the designated smoking area, at the far end of the parking lot - even though, as a graduate of three smoking-cessation courses, he knows that he can't trust his own words.

Nothing makes us feel worse about ourselves than when we experie...

Category: Self Care 

Tags: life, willpower, success